The day is nearly upon us. The day I had hoped would never happen. I am going off the grid folks. My faithful, *read knackered* laptop has just about given up the ghost. Along with a few sticky keys I now have a disc drive that tries to swallow everything whole and refuses to regurgitate, a very dodgy space-bar, and occasionally the poor thing gets really heated and it sounds like the whole machine wants to take-off. My nursing skills, *read minor dusting, stroking, and switching off and on again ad infinitum* are, alas, not enough to heal this poor creature. I have had to call in ...